Rage Recipes: Peach Basil Chicken Salad

Introduction: Today, I've decided to bless you ungrateful bastards with a recipe for Peach Basil Chicken Salad. Why? Because apparently, some of you need a reminder that salads can be fucking delicious too, not just a sad excuse for a meal. So get your sorry asses ready to make this mouth-watering dish before I lose my fucking mind.

Furious Rant: Let's talk about salad haters for a minute. Those spineless wimps who cringe at the sight of greens and think a meal isn't complete without a slab of bloody steak on their plate. Well, news flash, you weaklings - salads can kick ass too. And this Peach Basil Chicken Salad is here to prove it. So grab your cutting board and shut the hell up.

Ingredients:

• 2 boneless, skinless chicken breasts (call it bland, see if I care)
• 2 peaches, ripe and juicy (not those rock-hard pieces of crap)
• A handful of fresh basil leaves (don't you dare use that dried shit)
• 1/4 cup balsamic vinegar (get the good stuff, not the watery garbage)
• 2 tablespoons honey (don't even think about substituting with that artificial crap)
• Salt and pepper (season that chicken like your life depends on it)
• 2 tablespoons olive oil (extra virgin, no need for cheap imitations)

Recipe:

1. First, season your chicken breasts generously with salt and pepper. Heat up a skillet with olive oil over medium-high heat and cook the chicken until it's golden brown on both sides and cooked through. Set aside to cool.
2. While the chicken is cooling, pit and slice your peaches into wedges. Tear up that fresh basil like you mean it.
3. In a small bowl, mix balsamic vinegar, honey, and a pinch of salt. Whisk it like your life depends on it.
4. Slice the cooled chicken into strips and toss it in a bowl with peaches, basil, and the balsamic dressing. Make sure everything is coated evenly.
5. Serve that glorious Peach Basil Chicken Salad on a platter and watch as the doubters turn into believers.
6. Don't just stand there, start fucking cooking already! What are you waiting for, an engraved invitation? Get off your lazy ass and make this damn salad now!