Today we're diving into the basic bitch world with a recipe for Pumpkin Spice Latte Overnight Oats. Yes, I know, everyone loses their shit over anything pumpkin spice, but goddamn it, these oats are actually fucking delicious. So prepare yourself for a taste of fall in a mason jar, you basic motherfuckers.
Let's talk about pumpkin spice for a fucking minute. Every year, like clockwork, the world goes bonkers for pumpkin-spiced everything. People act like they've never tasted cinnamon and nutmeg before. And don't even get me started on all those basic bitches posing with their pumpkin spice lattes on Instagram. It's all just a bunch of bullshit marketing to make you feel like you need pumpkin spice to survive. Marketing can kiss my ass.
- Oats - Because apparently, you need to soak them overnight to make them edible
- Pumpkin Puree - Don't even think about using that pre-made pumpkin pie filling crap
- Vanilla Almond Milk - Regular milk is for losers
- Maple Syrup - None of that fake shit, go for the good stuff
- Pumpkin Pie Spice - Just say no to buying individual spices like a peasant
- Coffee - Preferably cold brew, because who has time to brew hot coffee in the morning?
- Chopped Pecans - For that extra bit of crunch so you don't feel like you're just eating baby food
- In a mason jar or airtight container, combine 1/2 cup of oats, 1/4 cup of pumpkin puree, 1/2 cup of vanilla almond milk, 1 tablespoon of maple syrup, and 1/2 teaspoon of pumpkin pie spice. Mix that shit together until it's all well combined.
- Pour in 1/2 cup of cold brew coffee because we need that caffeine hit to deal with all the pumpkin spice bullshit.
- Cover that jar with its lid and shake it like your life depends on it. Shake until everything is mixed up like a bad Tinder date.
- Let that concoction sit in the fridge overnight. Yeah, I know it's hard to wait, but good things come to those who wait, motherfuckers.
- In the morning, top your oats with chopped pecans like the fancy bitch you are. Take a fucking Instagram picture if you must.
- Enjoy your basic breakfast while secretly hating yourself for conforming to society's pumpkin spice obsession. But hey, at least it tastes damn good.
What the hell are you waiting for? Get off your lazy ass and make these Pumpkin Spice Latte Overnight Oats already. And don't forget to thank me for introducing you to this basic but delicious AF recipe.
xoxo
The Very Fucking Angry Chef
posted on Thursday, July 17 2025