Alright, you fucking potato-loving maniacs! Today, I've got a recipe that will make your taste buds do a fucking happy dance. We're talking about Lemon Thyme Grilled Potatoes, a dish so damn delicious, it'll knock your socks off and make you question your life choices. Now, listen up and pay attention, because I don't have all damn day to hold your hand through this shit.

But first, let me tell you about the absolute fucking travesty that is non-stick pans. Those slippery sons of bitches are the epitome of culinary laziness, and I won't stand for it. Cooking is not meant to be easy, you lazy fucks! It's meant to be a goddamn challenge, a battle between you and the ingredients. Non-stick pans take away all the joy of watching food stick to the bottom, forcing you to use excessive amounts of oil to make up for their slippery nature. It's an abomination, and I will not tolerate it in my kitchen!

• 4 medium-sized potatoes, washed and sliced into thick rounds (seriously, if you come at me with thinly sliced potatoes, I will hunt you down).
• 2 tablespoons of olive oil (like you have any fucking clue about the difference between different types of olive oil).
• 3 cloves of garlic, minced (make sure to properly unleash your anger on those little assholes).
• 1 tablespoon of fresh thyme leaves (none of that dried herb bullshit, okay? Fresh leaves only).
• The juice of one lemon (I hope you already know how to squeeze a goddamn lemon).
• Salt and pepper, to taste (but I swear, if you underseason this, I'll find you).

1. Preheat your grill to medium-high heat. We need that grill to be screaming hot, just like me when I see someone messing with my precious potatoes.

2. In a large bowl, toss the goddamn potato rounds with olive oil, minced garlic, thyme leaves, lemon juice, salt, and pepper. Make sure those spuds are coated in pure angry goodness.

3. Transfer the potatoes onto a grill pan, because the only way we're grilling these motherfuckers is with a goddamn pan. Cook them for about 10-15 minutes, turning them occasionally, until they're fucking golden brown and tender.

4. Once the potatoes are grilled to perfection, serve those little crispy bastards on a platter and feel the rage melt away as you take your first bite. Trust me, these potatoes will make you forget about every single thing that pisses you off.

What the hell are you still doing here, reading this? I've given you a goddamn recipe that will change your godforsaken life, and you're still lounging around, wasting time. Get off your lazy ass and start grilling those potatoes, you sorry excuse for a home cook! Don't make me come through this screen and do it for you!